Archive for November, 2010

I won’t lie and say I’m going to miss this mustache.  I hate it.  I hate how it makes me look and I hate how strangely people look at me for having it, so I’m awfully glad that it’s coming off tomorrow morning and I can grow my familiar beard back over the next week or so.

Still, it’s been for a great cause, and I’ll never wonder what I would look like with a mustache.  Now I know I look like an extra from a spectacularly bad 1970’s cop drama.  Imagine the face below as a purse snatcher in the on-set jail on Barney Miller.  Abe Vigoda totally would have worked me over with a phone book during commercial breaks

A Fine Mustache

Click to see full-size in a new window

I’ve got lots of photos to keep me from growing a ‘stache in the future, but I’d like to think that my facial ‘ribbon’ helped raise some awareness and badly-needed funds to help find a cure for prostate cancer and to spread the word to all the gents out there of what to look out for and how to seek treatment early on if they experience any of the symptoms.

If you’ve already donated to me (or anyone, for that matter), I want to say thanks.  If you haven’t, it’s not too late.  Just head on over to my Movember profile and make a donation and leave a witty remark.  If you donate $47,400 you’ll put me in the individual leader position for all of Canada!  I’m currently ranked about 30,000th in Canada for donations (out of nearly 120,00) and I don’t anticipate I’ll make up much ground in the next 24 hours.  Mind you, it’s not a contest.  It’s just a bunch of dudes growing mustaches for a great cause.

Here’s a few more photos to remember this great month by.  Sorry they’re a little out of focus.

The silent movie bad guy look

The silent movie bad guy look

I dunno, some kind of cowboy?

I dunno, some kind of cowboy?

Somewhat better

Somewhat better

A bad look, even without the 'stache

A bad look, even without the 'stache

The winter look

The winter look

And the winner is…

What the... ?

What the... ?

Keep in mind, you can’t unsee these photos now that you’ve seen them.  You’re welcome.

Comments No Comments »

We’re headed to Montreal this evening, which means driving into a city that’s already been hit with a freezing rain storm and is expecting snow over the weekend.  It’ s not going to be enough to build the first snowman of the year, which I’m looking forward to doing in our backyard sometime soon, but enough that it could make for a long drive tonight.

With the coming of the cold, I really miss having my beard to insulate my chin and jaw from the biting wind.  It’s crazy how a little extra hair can add that much protection against the winter winds, and I’m looking forward to regrowing my beard in a few days.  I’m also looking forward to saying goodbye to my terrible-looking mustache.  I thought I would get used to how it looks, but I’m both surprised and disgusted every time I glance in the mirror.  Still, it’s for a good cause so I’m going to see it through.

Have a great weekend, everyone.  Be sure to drive safe as we get winter’s first blast of scary-driving weather and if you can, just stay indoors snuggled up with a loved one and some hot chocolate.

Comments No Comments »

How is it only 30 days until Christmas already?  I mean, it feels like I just finished raking all the leaves off my lawn (probably because I literally just finished raking the leaves off my lawn) and all of a sudden, our sleepy neighbourhood is lit up like a Christmas tree, also literally.  Our neighbours appear to take Christmas lights VERY seriously, and I’m not playing the game this year.

First off, it’s too late.  Second, it’s too much work.  Third, it’s too much work.  However, I plan to pick up some outdoor lights on sale in January and figure out an impressive lighting strategy once the weather gets warm again this spring.  Experience with my dad has taught me that the biting cold of late November is NOT the time to be doing delicate work atop a ladder that requires the kind of digital dexterity that can only be accomplished without gloves on.

I’m thinking of mounting strings of lights to strips of fiberglass that I can just hook securely into my eavestroughs, but that could just be a pipe dream.  Ahem.  I’d also like to run a nice, long string of lights around our backyard fence that will not just look nice for Christmas, but provide some pretty ambient lighting all winter long.  Plus, the extra light will make it easier to find the ‘stocking stuffers’ that Mojo will leave in the yard.

I guess this also means that I’ll have to start thinking about my excuses and justifications for not having started my Christmas shopping yet.  There’s plenty of time for that, after all.  Plenty.  Tonnes.

Comments No Comments »

Our burger debauchery was well-timed given this week is the build-up to Thanksgiving for our friends south of the border (the US, not Mexico).  Everywhere we look on the internet and on TV, people are deep-frying turkeys, sharing recipes for yams and otherwise talking about all the foods we love.  Thanks to the beef gorging a few days ago, I’m not at all tempted to try any of these recipes anytime soon, and they aren’t succeeding in making my stomach start demanding goodies.  Not just yet, at least.

Those of us in Canada have a month to wait for our next feasting, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t celebrate with our friendly neighbours, mostly by enjoying all the Thanksgiving-themed episodes of our favourite shows on TV.  I wasn’t paying too much attention last night while Danielle was watching The Biggest Loser, but I’m pretty sure they had a challenge based on running a mile while stuffing a raw turkey.  Maybe I just dreamed that though.

I’m secretly hoping that this week’s episode of Fringe includes a trip to yet another dimension where turkeys rule the world and eat humans once a year in celebration of successful autumn human harvests from days of yore.  Modern Family will have the standard sitcom “dysfunctional family shares a meal and hilarity ensues” episode, but will somehow pull it off, and the US news shows will continue to push stories about holiday shopping deals and stories about how squash and cranberry farmers have been affected by the economic downturn.  Sorry if that spoils all the surprises for you.

Comments No Comments »

Yesterday I promised photos of the disgusting annual pilgrimage to Dangerous Dan’s Diner, and let it be know that this blog does NOT disappoint.  Well, at least when it comes to photos of people gorging themselves on ridiculously huge burgers.

Let the evidence of feasting begin!

[Click on any photo to see it larger in a new window]

Jared, Danielle, Matt and Dalton

Jared, Danielle, Matt and Dalton

We had a spectacular turnout with 17 people, most of whom are pictured here, but some got left out.  Sorry, my bad.

Joel does some jaw stretches

Joel does some jaw stretches

Joel’s was the first burger to show up, and you can tell because of how excited he looks.  The look of excitement doesn’t last long though.  It takes a LOT of concentration to take one of these down.  I mean, it’s hard enough just keeping it in one piece in your hands while you eat it.

Three dudes awaiting their fate

Three dudes awaiting their fate

Karim, Alex and I had a brief chat about how far we could go in taking down our combo.  Here’s a spoiler; they took it TOO far.

Two more dudes await their fate

Two more dudes await their fate

Dalton and Rob brought their A game, but before the burgers showed up, there was some doubt.  I won’t name names, but the owner was calling these guys out, almost by name.

Kenneth has an appetizer

Kenneth has an appetizer

Joel had a good head start on his burger before my hands got so gooey I couldn’t take any more photos, but I managed to get this one of Kenneth enjoying a “normal” burger, no doubt as an appetizer before the big show.

A delicate balancing act

A delicate balancing act

I tempted fate by opening up the hood on mine and eating some toppings off to make it easier to get my hands around.  It worked, but only because I had a more highly engineered basic burger structure than usual, thanks to the cook.

Not the recommended way to eat one of these

Not the recommended way to eat one of these

Karim got a great photo of my first bite with his iPhone.  This picture made its way onto Twitter in just a matter of seconds.  Isn’t technology grand?

Steve lookin' artsy

Steve lookin' artsy

Steve honestly looks scared of his burger.  Terrified even.  It was his first time and he fought and won a valiant battle.

Fries come last

Fries come last

Once the burgers were done, it was just a matter of cleaning off the table.  Fries and gravy.  Karim and Alex actually drank their remaining gravy so they could say they finished their entire combo.  I declined.

Dalton's greasy palm

Dalton's greasy palm

You’ll probably have to click on the larger version, but check out the underside of Dalton’s hand to get an idea of just how greasy these burgers were.

Sure, they were greasy, but they were also tasty.  Due to an improvement in the quality of bacon and better-cooked patties, this year’s burgers were unanimously declared the tastiest so far.

Room for dessert

Room for dessert

Karim and Alex each opted to top their meal off with a little something sweet; in this case a deep-fried Mars bar with ice cream and whipped cream topping.

No room for dessert here

No room for dessert here

For organizing the event, Mrs. Dangerous Dan presented me with this slightly NSFW dessert, which I enjoyed only a tiny bit of.  It’s a deep fried banana served with ice cream and whipped cream, and while it’s not my idea of a remarkable dessert, I appreciated the gesture, if not the innuendo that came with it.

Thanks again to everyone for coming out and for getting into the spirit of the event.  I would say that I can hardly wait until our next trip to Dangerous Dan’s, but I think once a year is just right for this kind of gluttony, especially as we’re all getting older.

If this looks like the kind of thing you’d be into, stay tuned next November for an invite.  I can’t promise there will be as many mustaches around the table, but the beef will be there and ready for you to dive in with both hands.  Just plan ahead and have some Tums or Rolaids at home for afterwards.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m getting hungry.

Comments 6 Comments »

The Seventh Annual trip to Dangerous Dan’s was a resounding success.  We had a record number of attendees (17) and a record number of ladies present (with 4).  I’m also proud to say that everyone who ordered the Coronoary Combo succeeded in finishing it, with some going back from deep-fried desserts (Karim, Alex and Dalton).  I listed their names so you could know that they’re disgusting human beings.

I’ll have photos up tomorrow and I’ll include more detail about the trip, but we had a blast and I wanted to thank everyone for coming out on a freezing cold Sunday to participate.

I’ll also have some photos of my ‘stache progress, which is coming along very nicely.  I look absolutely terrible, so I’m looking forward to shaving it off in just over a week, but it’s a great conversation starter and I think it’s starting to creep people out in public.

Danielle has been a total champ for putting up with it this long, and to share your appreciation, feel free to make a donation to Prostate Cancer Canada on my Movember mustache’s behalf here.  If I can get just another $69 in donations, I’ll get two free tickets to the Movember gala and Danielle will get a night out surrounded by better and worse mustaches than mine.  I already scored one ticket for getting $100 in donations, but what’s the fun of a gala without your best girl by your side?

Comments No Comments »

Dear friends (and others),

Some of you are stalwarts at this annual event, while others are hearing about it for the first time.  Rest assured, you are all being cordially invited because you are human and eating food is a requirement for life, and if you read this blog you might just be disgusting enough to get a kick out of this food in particular.

Of course, I’m referring to the annual pilgrimage to Dangerous Dan’s Diner on Queen Street East (at Broadview) where we will try our best to take down Coronary Combos in the battle to show those uppity vegans who’s boss.

The seventh annual trip will take place this Sunday, November 21 at 2pm.  In keeping with tradition, this year’s trip will be on the same day as the Toronto Santa Claus Parade, so keep that in mind for your commute to the holy shrine of beefdom.  In case you’re wondering why, we’re holding it in the afternoon to avoid both the lunch and dinner rushes, and so that everyone taking part really only has to have one meal that day.

For the uninitiated, these burgers are ridiculously huge, but not altogether untasty.  To get an idea of what you might be in for, check out last year’s public invite and the photos that followed, after we rode the burger bus.  Then, tell me that you wouldn’t love a photo like that for your Facebook or Twitter profile pic.

As always, spectators, friends and significant others are more than welcome (this event is open to all genders), but we encourage anyone not taking part to be supportive rather than judgmental.  After all, consuming these combos is a feat of arms, as it were.

Feel free to forward this along to anyone who might want to take part, watch or even document this event for future posterity.  If you know anyone with first aid skills, or who is particularly handy with a defibrillator, they would be welcome too.

Mark the event in your calendar, share it with your friends, make sure your camera (and stomach pump) are charged and ready to go and for goodness sake, start training now.  I hope to see you all in the land of beef in a few short days.

*Note: I’ve already called ahead and warned the fine folks at DD’s that there will be at least 20 people there, so be sure to show up!

Comments 1 Comment »

It’s been sixteen days since I shaved my face clean, and I’m still not used to the face I see in the mirror each morning, nor is Danielle.  However, the conversations I’ve had with colleagues, friends, family and strangers about what Movember is all about has made it all worthwhile.

Prostate cancer is a disease that kills people.  People with families and loved ones die from it.  All it takes to catch it early is to keep an eye out for warning signs and get tested regularly if you’re in a risk group.  Caught early on, treatment can result in full recovery.

Please take the time to talk to the men you care about and ask them if they know what to look for and if they’re in a risk group.  Tell them to read about prostate cancer on Wikipedia or talk to their doctor.  Together, we can keep this terrible disease from killing the people we care about.

To that end, I’m nearly halfway through growing my ‘ribbon’ and it’s coming along very nicely.  You can click on the image to see it full size in a new window.

Movember 16

Movember 16

If you’d like to help contribute to research into a cure for prostate cancer, I encourage you to make a small donation (or a large one) to the Movember campaign.  You can donate on behalf of my awesome Super Mario ‘stache here.  Thanks for your support and for spreading awareness.

Comments No Comments »