Dave Duncan

"Eat Well, Stay Fit, Die Anyway"

Let the Games Begin…

So we Canadians can look forward to a February Election. At least we know when it is well ahead of time so we can all look forward to a few extra months of campaigning that’s NOT campaigning (that was a little sarcastic, by the way). Still, it’s not all bad. For example, we can look forward to tons of hilarious cameos by notable politicians on shows like Air Farce, The Monday Report, and Corner Gas.

So, with three months to go… would anyone dare to make a prediction? Nothing binding, mind you… but I’m sure that if it turns out that you are right, you’ll gloat and brag and send the link to this post to all your friends and family… surely resulting in guest spots on shows like Air Farce, The Monday Report, and Corner Gas (after all, this IS Canadian TV).

I’ll go first, but before you get all worked up… this is just a prediction of how I think the country will vote (barring any leader doing or saying something COMPLETELY insane in the next few months), and does not necessarily reflect my personal views.

I predict another Liberal minority gov’t with the Conservatives pulling closely behind. The NDP will gain a few more seats, and the Bloc… will continue to be French. Britney and Kevin will be divorced, and their baby sold to the highest bidding magazine. Brad and Angelina will have married, but sadly Angelina will kill and consume Brad on their wedding night. California will break off into the ocean, but no one will notice right away. Our minority gov’t will offer aid and our famous DART team, but we will be turned down resulting in more cameo appearances on shows like Air Farce, The Monday Report, and Corner Gas to boost our collective spirits.

The next cabinet will come to an end with a rousing musical number that will include Bryan Adams, Anne Murray, Celine Dion (live via satellite from her Howard Huges-esque seclusion in the desert) and the RCMP doing the Musical Ride. Sadly, the Mounties will the highlight of the year… and will go on to do cameo appearances on shows like Air Farce, The Monday Report, and Corner Gas .

I’m pretty confident about my prediction, but anything can happen… so don’t hold me to it. Now, I’d love to stay and write some more, but I have to head down to CBC studios… I have a guest spot on This Is Wonderland.

1 comment

1 Comment so far

  1. Joel November 22nd, 2005 8:11 pm

    I’ve got a doozy of a prediction. Having not really watched any news on TV for months, I believe that Layton will gain maybe 1 seat, Liberals will lose a bunch and Conservatives will gain a bunch. I expect they’ll be neck and neck with a coin flip deciding the ‘winner’. The Bloc will gain a seat or two. The Green Party will continue to not have ANY seats, but they’ll have a slightly better showing than last time cause the Greens actually have some federal spending this time around. I’ll vote Green (again) cause Liberals are corrupt and there’s no way I’m voting Conservative unless Stronach returns and Mackay leads the party. And Layton still reminds me of a Used Car Salesman. Remember last time when he just wouldn’t shut up? Ah good times….